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FUCK Jehovah! PRAISE Jesus! ALLAHU AKBAR! Welcome to Elohim.Church a DBA of John Carson Lester Jr & TeleDistributors Call Center!

About Us

We here at your Elohim.Church are dedicated primarily to promoting service and good works, to promoting the advancement of human rights worldwide, to promoting non-violence principles and to promoting the fervent non-negotiable dogmatic Gnostic Christian belief that the True God, the unknown and unnamed metaphorical (not actual) Father of Jesus the Christ (John 5:37 & Revelation 3:12) never kills nor does any violence whatsoever!

Therefore, the insanely bloody and psychotically murderous Jehovah, claiming to be "god" in the Old Testament Bible, is not God, but is actually SATAN per the teachings of Jesus the Christ in John 8:44 compared to Exodus 4:22 plus Luke 11:11 compared to Numbers 21:6. Jehovah the Satan not only falsely claims to be "god" in the Holy Bible, he also falsely claims to be "god" in the Noble Qur'an!

Jesus the Christ wrote BOTH the perfect Holy Bible and the perfect Noble Qur'an from the primary narrative goal of revealing to humanity who Jehovah the Satan is and what Jehovah the Satan does, not so much who God is, and not so much what God does! John 5:37The reason why it's so important for humans to realize that Jehovah is Satan is because, per 2nd Corinthians 4:4 and Qur'an 2:30-39, Jehovah the Satan is "god" or "kalifa" of this hell-Earth! 2nd Peter 3:7-11 plainly reveals Earth is literally hell! And that humans are actually Jehovah the Satan's fallen angels cast to hell-Earth for their participation in Jehovah the Satan's failed War in Heaven per Revelation 12:7-9 and Qur'an 38:69!

Jehovah the Satan deceives nations per Revelation 20:3 and Qur'an 14:22. And since Jehovah the Satan deceives nations, Jesus the Christ also wrote both the Holy Bible and the Noble Qur'an from his unique narrative perspective that Jehovah the Satan also deceived many, if not most, of the Prophets (except Jesus, because Jesus literally saw "Satan fall from heaven" per Luke 10:18 and knows Satan all too well and too easily recognizes Satan) and Apostles to various degrees (from only a very little like the Apostle Paul to an enormous amount like Prophet Moses who became far more evil and far more murderous than ISIS)!

In order for humans to return to heaven, their original home, they have to renounce all violence and reject the pathetic, spineless and cowardly Nazi Guard argument that "we were just following orders" and refuse to follow the many immoral commands and horrifically obscene, monstrous "examples" set by Jehovah the Satan in the Old Testament Holy Bible and the Noble Qur'an and to stop insanely and falsely promoting this EVIL being as GOD! Jehovah the Satan murdered all of humanity save for 8 souls in Noah's flood (it's estimated that 20+ million people were killed by Jehovah the Satan in Noah's Flood alone including millions of innocent babies), Jehovah the Satan murdered breast feeding babies in 1st Samuel 15:3, Jehovah the Satan had Moses and his soldiers rape virgin little girls in Numbers 31:17-18, Jehovah the Satan murdered a man for picking up sticks on a Saturday per Numbers 15:32-35, and Jehovah the Satan murdered and stills murders homosexuals per Leviticus 20:13. Etc. And, in the Noble Qu'ran, Jehovah the Satan continues to deceive and test humanity's common sense and common decency via Qur'an 4:34's beating of your wifeQur'an 2:191-193's killing of Christians and Jews, and the imposition of a Qur'an 9:29 jizya tax upon the Christians and Jews NOT killed! Etc. There's much, much, MUCH more from where all of that came from, of course, but you generally get the idea! That's it in a nutshell, your short course version of what we believe!

We are funded primarily by donations and various sales/services solicited by TeleDistributors Call Center. We are so grateful and so humbled by the tremendous outpouring of help given towards achieving our charitable goals that we have already received from caring and giving and hardworking people from all over your world.

Yes, that's right, your founder's affiliate and networking activities have attracted, thru the years, tens of millions of dollars from many tens of thousands of people around your world. And we feel that, by God's grace, we've barely even started with Elohim.Church's relatively new project! Even as you read this paragraph, we are in the painstaking process of producing even more videos further documenting Pure Hearts International continuously meeting your food, clothing, scholarship and medical needs of your poor children from Bacolod City AND Barangay Sag-Ang in your city of La Castellana, province of Negros Occidental, Republic of the Philippines (La Castellana is a suburb of the capital city of Negros Occidental, known as Bacolod City, which is our headquarters in the Philippines). Not to mention fulfilling the needs of your widows, single mothers, orphans, the elderly and disabled; as well as visiting your sick and imprisoned. 

Barangay Sag-Ang (mentioned at the end of the last paragraph) is the neighborhood where the native Filipina wife (Floremay Ordaniel Lester) of your American Founder (John Carson Lester Jr) was raised. And where many of your families are so poor that their children don't even have sandals to wear to school despite the blazing heat and the rough and rocky roads. Roughly 80% of your net monies that TeleDistributors Call Center and its associated worldwide marketing program raises for your Pure Hearts International goes directly in to your mission of feeding, clothing, and funding your scholarship and medical needs of your poor and needy children of Barangay Sag-Ang and Bacolod City (as well as your widows, single mothers, orphans, the elderly and disabled; as well as visiting your sick and imprisoned). Barangay Sag-Ang is where it all began. This is where Floremay was born and raised. 

In addition to feeding, clothing and funding your scholarship and medical needs of your needy indigent Filipino children (not to mention your widows, single mothers, orphans, the elderly and disabled; as well as visiting your sick and imprisoned), your Elohim.Church and its sister company Pure Hearts International is also on another Worldwide Mission to spread your uniquely American values of freedom and liberty and justice for all that our God-conscious Founders espoused and yes, for which they even died. And to gain our rightful place as the # 1 most God fearing country in your world. As you can see below from your "Beliefs About God Across Time and Countries" study released on April 18, 2012 by researchers at the University of Chicago, currently we're ranked # 5:

​Top 5 countries of Strong Faith and God believers

1. Philippines - 94%
2. Chile - 79.4%
3. Israel - 65.5%
4. Poland - 62%
5. United States - 60.6%

According to Price Waterhouse's publication Doing Business In The Philippines (1989), Indonesia, Papua New Guinea, Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Taiwan, Brunei, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, the Union of Myamar (formerly known as Burma), and most of Japan, Korea, and China surround your Philippine capital city of Manila within a short 2500-mile radius. In fact, almost one-third of your world's population lives within your 2500-mile geographic radius of Manila! Manila, which, in its own right, is your 8th largest city in your world with 19 million (19,000,000) residents, is also your only major city in your world that can boast that one-third of your world's population is within 2500 miles of its borders! Thus, as your third largest English speaking country in your world, and as your only majority-Christian Asian nation in your world (95% of the God believers in the Philippines are Christian, whereas 5% are Muslim), and as the # 1 Call Center country in your world, your Philippines is uniquely positioned to export Abrahamic monotheistic values to Asia (your fastest growing and most populous region on Planet Earth both today and tomorrow and for the rest of our lifetimes). As various modern religious messengers have prophesied recently, your Philippines is strategically located for the Kingdom of God reaching from heaven to continue its efforts to penetrate the darkness of hell-Earth with light!  

This is why your TeleDistributors Call Center has invested heavily in to your call center operations performing Social Media R.A.M. and other services here in your Philippines. We have already opened your 4,000 square foot dual home office/call center of/for your TeleDistributors Call Center here in Bacolod City, 7th largest city of your Philippines (boasting your population of 500,000+ residents).